I'm 25f, recently opened a marketing agency with my husband and we're expecting to make a good amount of money very soon which is great. I know the title sounds a little dramatic but I could genuinely use some advice especially if you're a bit older and a business owner. I married my husband a year and a half ago, left my country and moved to his, literally into his childhood bedroom. We're together 24/7, working 24/7. No weekends off. I haven't seen my family/friend for like 6 months and they don't even know what we're doing because we don't like to talk about it before we're successful. Actually, I didn't even talk to my dad in around 6 months but thats a different story. As you can probably imagine at this point, our social life is basically dead.
Time really flies so I don't even really get the time to think about all the things I don't have time for, all I get is exactly 2,5 hours of break at night and that's barely enough to watch some show just to get my mind to stop thinking about work.
When my family calls me at random times I almost get annoyed at them for thinking I have time to talk when all I can think of is how to get stuff done. I'm not sure if anyone can relate but my family history is quite diffcult. Addiction and depression, money issues and all of that stuff so running away from that to actually build something that could potentially solve my families problems is what gives everything I do a meaning. Is this something anyone else experiences? And if so, how the f do you deal with it? I don't really wanna make time for anything else but at the same time I feel like people are starting to build resentment because I make them feel like I don't care when it's the opposite.
I think I'm losing my friends and family
byu/Cheap_Original_5994 inEntrepreneur
Posted by Cheap_Original_5994
27 Comments
Sounds like a path to depression.
Family is the most important thing. Why are you doing this if it’s not even for your family? You’re showing them
that they don’t matter to you when your business doesn’t even exist yet. Why would you have more time to devote to them
once things get started? I don’t think they’re stupid. You have to choose between being a selfish jerk or a good person to your family. Being an entrepreneur or not has nothing to do with it.
There are only a few things that money can’t buy, but friends and a family that loves you is one of them.
This sounds a lot like Alex/leila hormozi
Virtue signaling đźâđš
Youâre not doing it for them, youâre doing it for yourself.
Maybe have boundaries of times family can call.
I donât run my business anymore but there was always something to work on and my brain never shut off either. Hopefully your business leads to something amazing soon and you can hire someone and buy a little time back.
Money only solves a certain amount of problems, it definitely can make you happier, but certainly doesnât replace family.
Also, you need a balance or youâll burn out, and have no business or people.
Feel you. And – not your family is the most important thing. You are. It is ok to work hard. You know for what you do it. Your life as is doesnât have to be like this forever, a year even is nothing. If you care about your family simply tell them you are trying to build a business from scratch and that you have only little time. But also tell them that you love them (if you do). I donât tell my family except my partner anything. Not what I work, not that I quit, not that I try to build a business, nothing. For reasons. And – that is totally okay.
Try to find a balance
Read your last sentence to yourself. You’re saying you don’t want to make time for anyone else and are concerned they’re starting to think you don’t care about them. If you cared about them you would want to make time for them.
If your friends and family said they don’t want to spend any of their time on you, would your assumption be that they care about you?
Do you actually care about them or do you just want people who will celebrate you when you reach your goals?
You gotta get out a bit socially. Pheromones.
You need to communicate, set limits, and find a good balance for yourself.
My partner and I are wary of burnout, and make sure to take time off and communicate where we are at. There is no exact formula, but you need more space to live life and not be stuck in work mode.
Welcome to business ownership. Nothing wrong with putting your head down and working. The reality is, as you’re growing, you will also outgrow relationships.
People don’t like change, and you’re changing.
I can relate. I poured myself into business as well. Family was full of abuse addition and co-dependent living.
I disappeared for like four years. Got my life together. I did eventually try to fix things with family. I canât say it ever really worked.
My advice from someone who started in his twenties. Iâm now 55 and wish I had put myself In therapy. I love business but it took my 7 businesses to get grounded.
We have a strange tie to family but now all families are healthy and can even be harmful. OP only you know the situation and pouring energy into something for the future is positive. Just get some help along the way. I wish I had earlier. It would have saved me a ton of money and heartache.
As someone who has run a marketing agency for the last 4 years that I also started with a partner: If youâre having to work so much that you cannot take a phone call, youâre doing something(s) super duper wrong.
Plan an evening off every week. Call your family.
For starters, maybe you should get off Reddit and go seek professional counseling?
Life is short. Carve out some time each day for other important people and activities in life. It doesnât have to be much. 30 minutes for phone calls, 15 minutes for a walk, a couple hours on weekends for connection and hobbies. Otherwise, you will have regrets.
Itâs really important to find balance, otherwise you will burnout
See if you can build some systems and automate some stuff in your business by using workflows (N8N), AI etc.
For example onboarding must be automated first.
Then work delivery.
And donât forget that in business you can hire people, itâs not a job.
Double-check if you are not just glorified freelancer.
I run marketing agency myself and I automated so many things itâs crazy how easy it is VS how it was before. I now have time to live too.
Make time for the people you love – schedule it in your calendar, itâs important
Life is short and it wonât be too long before visiting gravestones will become your only family activity.
Google « work ON not IN your business » and get back with additional viewpoints.
Hey OP,
Here are my thoughts. Iâve started several successful businesses and no Iâm no longer in the rat race as Iâve hired good staff.
1. Donât watch tv. Replace this with walks or healthy meal prep or reading a book.
2. As soon as you can, hire staff to help reduce the burden. Even before you start making âa good amount of moneyâ.
3. You and your partner should both go out one night a week. Together or even better apart. You donât have to spend much. But that bedroom will do you in.
4. Remember that your doing today what other people wonât so that you can have tomorrow what other people canât. I sacrificed much of my 20s into
my businesses, but today I have it better than most.
There is no balance in the beginning. Donât listen to the part time âlife coachesâ that tell you there should be. But try to squeeze in a little bit of personal time. This is where your aha moments come from. Kind of like finding your keys when you stop looking so hard for them.
5. Eat as healthy as you can. Bad food leads to low energy and less than ideal states of mind.
6. Your why is VERY powerful. Print it out and put it up on your wall along with anything else you want. Your partner could do the same. Smile every time you look at it and imbue it with emotion.
7. Talk to your family during your 2.5hrs. You can combine this with walking or meal prepping. When they ask what youâre doing, just let them know youâll tell them when the time is right.
And in the words of Tim Ferris: âFind joy and delight in everything you doâ
Youâve got this!!
For the best advice start following Alex and Leila Hormozi if you arenât already following them. They address this issue.
Need a work/life balance otherwise severe burnout will occur.
Schedule a Family Zoom each week that you always attend. Update all weekly.
Iâve been in business for ourselves for a couple decades. Make time for yourself or you will regret it later. You are on a path of self destruction.
This is normal, youre moving up and will make new friends