I need sound advice as I'm struggling with all the new changes happening in my life. A little background: my ex boyfriend and I recently broke up. We have 2 kids together, he really wanted a big family so we bought a new 2024 SUV with a third row, with all the bells and whistles. At the time made a lot of sense since we would be expanding our family. Turns out, he's planning on expanding his family with someone else. So now I am left with a huge car payment of $1000/month with a 4.99% APR for the next 3.5 years. I make roughly 42k a year and have childcare expenses and soon a rental expense too. I will be left upside down if I trade in the car for something smaller and practical as a single mom now. I'm a mess right now but I don't know how I'll make it with a huge car payment. Carmax is offering $29,400 and I owe $43,000
Editing to add a few more: I haven't filed for child support but I've talked to my ex about it and seems like it's going to be a long drawn out process.
This isn't rhetorical first time he has stepped out of our relationship so I can't swallow my pride anymore and stick around. His new gf is pregnant.
We did get extended warranty and gap insurance. I could possible call to see if I can get any type of prorated refund to lower my overall loan.
My heart is literally going back after this whole ordeal. I know I made a huge mistake going into this car purchase. Couldn't think straight the day after the purchase, guess I sensed something bad was coming and here we are.
Should I trade in my car as a newly single mom?
byu/facelessnatasha inpersonalfinance
Posted by facelessnatasha
14 Comments
Girl that payment is eating up like a third of your income! Trade it in, take the hit, and get something reliable for way less. Being upside down sucks but drowning in that payment while trying to raise two kids alone is worse. You need breathing room financially right now.
You probably won’t be able to trade it in with that much equity, because it requires you to buy another car that is far outside what you could afford.
Yeah no bank is going to carry that negative number easily. Is it just in your name both or his?
You definitely need to get rid of this vehicle.
This is why I wouldn’t have a kid with anyone that I was not married to intentionally. Too easy to have your partner dip and leave you holding the bag. I definitely am only talking about this from a personal finance perspective.
Have you tried Carvana for a second offer? Do you have any savings to help close the gap between what the car is worth and what you owe? Car is just in your name? The interest rate isn’t bad, so at least there is that, but it’s way more car than you need for sure. I hope some child support is coming your way, if not take him to court.
What’s your ex paying in child support?
Go to KBB.com and run the estimator for private party value. The dealer is offering you closer to wholesale price. I would then go to a credit union and get an unsecured loan to cover the difference of what you owe and price for what you sell the car for. Then go find a 10 year old Toyota sienna minivan or Mazda 5 that’s cheap and reliable so you can cut your payment down considerably.
Your over a barrel. See if you can find a private buyer. You’ll still need to come up with the difference to close out the loan. But your looking at a big difference in what you can sell it for and what you owe. Then you need a vehicle but with such a low wage it’s going to be really rough finding something in your budget. Can you move back in with your parents till you can get back on your feet?
what an a-hole. i’d some how try and figure out a way to cover the payment since 4.99% for 3.5 years is a lot better than any other terms i’ve seen people post here. this can be very hard as a single mother with two kids, especially since there’s urgency.
random but i hope you put him on child support for top dollar and don’t try that friendly oh let me not do that to him route some women do.
This isn’t what you asked, but please go after the ex boyfriend for child support. He should be paying a good amount of that childcare cost.
Also depending on what state you live in, you might qualify for a subsidy, have you checked?
Voluntary repossession to get rid of that payment. It will ding your credit. Make sure that you’ve made other transportation arrangements prior to doing this.
Move fast to try to get a temporary order for child support. Even though the full process will take longer, you don’t have to wait until the end to get anything.
Since you’ll need an attorney for the child support process anyway, also ask whether your ex may owe you additional support under an implied contract stemming from you making financial decisions based on living together and sharing expenses. If he makes substantially more than you and you planned around a joint household, the fact that you’re not entitled to alimony doesn’t necessarily mean you aren’t entitled to anything. An attorney can tell you whether this is recognized in your state and whether your circumstances support a claim.
If living with your parents is an option, and especially if it could potentially lower childcare costs if they are able to watch the kids some while you’re working, that’s probably worth the move and job change.
Keep the GAP coverage. If you are in an accident, you don’t want to be stuck paying the difference between the car’s current value & what you owe while also having to get a new-to-you car. I’d probably try to get a refund on the extended warranty, though.
Speaking of tax season. Only one of you can claim the kids. If you are entitled to claim the kids, file your taxes the first second you can. Otherwise if he claims them first you will not be able to and will have to file a paper return if you contest him claiming them. You won’t see your refund for ages. (the credit goes to whomever files first, whether they are eligible to claim the kid(s) or not. You can challenge it, but it takes ages to unravel, particularly with an understaffed IRS)