At the beginning of January, I had finally paid off about $2000 of credit card debt after a few months of locking down my budget. It was incredibly rewarding and I’m proud of myself for pulling out of it. On top of that, I had also saved about $1500 of an emergency fund as well, and was I excited for that to keep building. I had been watching a lot of podcasts and personal finance content to better understand why I got into debt in the first place.
I don’t know what the hell happened in the last few weeks, but I just snowballed into recklessness again. It started with a gym membership that I’m excited about, and had worked into my budget. But then led to new workout clothes, new water-bottle, new yoga mat, etc. It wasn’t all at once, but I made the decisions individually over a few weeks. Now I’m looking back and realizing I bought almost $1000 of things all together.
The absolute worst was I also started Door Dashing food again. I’ve done it twice in the past week, and it was something I told myself I would never do again. I love cooking. I live across the street from a grocery store. The food I order is mediocre at best with atrocious fees.
Watching my already small emergency fund disappear is sickening. I’m returning what I can of the clothes and equipment.
I swear I’m a smart and reasonable person typically. I have a solid job, a supportive boyfriend, and I overall love my life. The credit card debt felt like a blip that I overcame. But now my spending habits are equivalent to someone that’s manic and irresponsible.
I don’t really know why I’m posting this I guess. Maybe looking for others that also felt like they had it all under control, but then realized they actually don’t.
overspending again. I don’t know what’s wrong with me
byu/sweetiepep inpersonalfinance
Posted by sweetiepep
8 Comments
It takes the average smoker 7 attempts before they actually are successful at quitting smoking.
Relapsing is normal.
For some folks, it’s just part of their journey.
Now that you’ve identified the problem, what is your plan to address the issue moving forward?
Therapy for shopping addiction will help you, even if you’re not literally addicted. You need to learn new coping tools for dealing with change, celebrating successes, and struggling through difficult events that don’t involve purchases. Therapy will absolutely help you do that.
The thing with discipline is that only 100% discipline actually makes an impact. Being disciplined 90% of the time is next to worthless because the gains from discipline are slow but the slide into oblivion from being undisciplined can be as steep as you can imagine.
So you can say you are financially responsible most of the time…but that doesnt really mean anything.
Delete the apps, that was the best decision for me. Therapy could help.
I’m not totally sure how to help with the gym-adjacent things other than checking your spending more often and getting a solid picture about it at smaller time intervals (that way it doesn’t get away from you). rule of thumb is not to spend money you don’t have if you can help it, so it may be helpful for you to pay off your card more often than you’re doing right now to keep yourself accountable (ie pay your balance twice or three times a month instead of monthly. that way you can see the money from your checking decrease and get an idea of what you actually have available to spend). People have said all sorts of things about utilization % and keeping a statement balance but everyone says something different about whether it’s necessary or not, so I don’t even bother with that stuff and my credit score is fine.
But with respect to the door dashing, I’d say delete the app / close your account and start meal prepping over the weekend or something so you have easy meals on the days you’re tired. You don’t have to eat it everyday but this way you always have something to fall back on that isn’t delivery.
I lost 200 lbs, and I’ve now gained 120 lbs of it back.
Addicts are Addicts and admitting you have a problem is the first step. Saw my doctor today to get a referral to see a gastric surgeon. I would suggest cutting up the credit cards and maybe switch from a debit card to cash only.
I also don’t think you shpuld punish yourself for this because being excited for the gym membership and wanting to buy new gears for the gym is very natural and reasonable. I just think that the prices of these yoga clothes, water bottles, and mat etc are just unreasonably expensive if you buy from popular brands like lulupemon and alo etc. so don’t be harsh on yourself, maybe you needed that kind of fun and reward. Accept and embrace yourself and try to get back to your track again??
From what I know shopping can be a stress reliever, and oftentimes therapeutic. It seems you are self aware and can succeed, so I’m wondering if there is something deeper happening in other parts of life that might be distracting you from sticking to the discipline?