I haven’t paid my student loan in 4 years

I know, the title is horrible and it’s so embarrassing, but I haven’t paid my student loans in 4 years and now it is in default. idk how I got myself to do this… and why I would assume ignoring it is going to disappear. It was a little bit after COVID I enrolled into a 4 year and due to juggling school and a toxic work environment I could not mentally handle it anymore. I was in the worst mental state during that time, but it’s not an excuse. I want to get my finances back on track

and pay off my credit cards (which that I pay on time but don’t pay my student loans? right makes no sense I know lol.) and be debt free. idk where to begin and i’m so anxious to call the debt consolidation company for help. has anyone else been in a similar situation by chance? if so, could you provide me with some advice…it would be greatly appreciated and please be kind to me im fragile lol. thank you!!