Everyone talks about how to get to FI. Save more. Invest consistently. Stay the course.
But what I don't see discussed enough is what actually feels different once FI gets close. Once it stops being a spreadsheet and starts feeling real.
Not the math. The experience. What caught you off guard?
Was it how different risk feels when you're no longer in pure accumulation mode? How your relationship with work shifted before you even pulled the trigger? How uncertainty suddenly felt more real instead of theoretical?
Or something else entirely?
I'm genuinely curious what surprised people the most. The stuff that doesn't show up in the 4% rule discussions.
What surprised you the most AFTER you got close to FI?
byu/Beneficial-Ad-9986 infinancialindependence
Posted by Beneficial-Ad-9986
7 Comments
How little saving more means to your timeline when you’re close. I was putting away about 100k/yr, an an extra 1k a month saving would move the needle like 2 months….so I decided to get a $900 dollar car payment instead and enjoy the ride.
The worry! Before I couldnt imagine not feeling secure with this amount saved up. I was so confident once i reached it, i would never feel job stress, wouldnt need to watch spending as much, or save as much.
Now with everything happening geopolitically… will it be enough? If i leave my job and have to come back for some reason due to the global economy exploding, would I be able to? What about unforeseen circumstances?
And then theres partial loss of identity due to not working. I really enjoy my work, but its been hard to see several industries i work in dying (all entertainment related in some way) and i miss how things were, but it may just never come back to what it once was.
Supposedly a 3 percent withdrawal would always be enough to weather a storm, tried and tested by all the past economic shattering events weve been through. But still, theres always the doubt if it will be the same this time or worse.
Set and forget.
It’s been a slow gradual change with more focus on mental.
The other thing is that additional savings doesn’t really add much more.
Dying with zero really helped balance time and experience now vs the future. This was the biggest change for me.
I think my relationship to work has changed in a way that I didn’t anticipate.
On the one hand, I feel less concerned about getting fired. I’d certainly welcome a termination with severance at this point. This part doesn’t surprise me.
The flip side of that, for me, is that I have less motivation to work, because my work doesn’t really interest me anymore on an intrinsic level. But, since I care about my co-workers and my direct supervisor, I feel some guilt when I do not work as hard as others. I’m in a limbo state where my sense of personal obligation does not quite balance out my disdain for doing uninteresting/tedious work.
Few things –
1. How it’s not a binary number or point-in-time but freedom gradually increases with invested assets, all the way to the FI number
2. Clarified how much of my perceived liking/motivation for work/co-workers was really driven by the paycheck…and the closer I got to FI, I magically cared way less about all of it
3. Personally, things have been “hard” since I’ve got close to FI, because I’m now confronted with facing more foundational issues/flaws in my personality that may have led to some of my unhappiness generally. Pre-FI, it was a lot easier to blame issues on work and conversely not worry about “core issues” due to time spent at work.
4. All I wanted from FI was more time with kids. I’m starting to realize there’s such a thing as “over-exposure” to kids which has been challenging. Particularly exacerbated by my introverted personality that needs self-time to energize.
Only 5 months in, so, lots more surprises/learnings to come. But it’s been fun yet testing so far.
How much more relaxed I am overall. The overwhelming peace that comes with it.
Impending layoffs at my current company? Don’t care. Random unexpected expense? Whatever. Outside of health, nothing is an emergency.
All problems feel easily solvable and the background hum of anxiety that career/decision optimization used to take up a lot of space in my head is just gone.
My experiences
– There is always spreadsheets, both before and after FI 🙂
– Until I left a stressful job, FI didn’t really matter till I R.E.’d. I was still stressed and working hard, regardless of net worth. I thought maybe I ‘wouldn’t care as much”, but 20+ years busting ass / caring is a hard behavior to assuage. The relationship with work didn’t change just because I had “the money I needed”.
– Market swings make for emotional days. Losing a lot of money affects how I feel and act, even if there’s “enough” to be safe. The opposite is true as well, I feel great on days the market soars.
– Your time and experiences jump to #1 and #2 on the list vs “make more money!”. Somewhat related to the other comment about REing.
– Didn’t take a promotion that would have been more pay (by a lot) but less time with family, friends and would have has a significant commute. (if this was offered 10 years ago, I would have probably taken it)