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    Mom racked up 8k on my credit card

    Okay so here are the facts:

    – I opened a Capital One credit card at 18 with a $300 limit (about 11 years ago)

    – About a year later, my mom took the card to "keep in the safe" and told me she would pay off the balance and cancel it

    – I never made any payments on the card and no longer had access to it

    – A few years ago, I became aware that the account still existed and had a balance of around $5,000

    – I did not have access to the account, and I believe the contact information (address/ email/phone) had been changed, as I never received statements or notifications

    – Last week, I checked again and the balance had increased to around $6,000

    – In the last few days, the credit limit was increased (without my involvement) from 7k to 10k and the balance is now close to $8,000, with recent charges including international transactions

    – I have not used this card in many years and did not authorize any use of the account

    – I was preparing to address this directly, but the balance is now actively increasing

    My questions are:

    1.Should I report this as fraud/ unauthorized use to Capital One?

    1. How likely is it that I could still be held responsible for the balance given the length of time?

    2. What are the risks or consequences of reporting this, especially if the person responsible is a family member?

    3. Should I file a police report, or wait to see what Capital One requires?

    I want to handle this correctly and protect myself legally and financially going forward.

    Mom racked up 8k on my credit card
    byu/aggressively-napping inCreditCards



    Posted by aggressively-napping

    10 Comments

    1. Sel_drawme on

      1. Yes.
      2. It depends.
      3. The risk is your relationship with your mom.
      4. Both.

      // Also, giving a credit limit increase when the balance owed is increasing is crazy on Cap Ones part. And, if you noticed this a few years ago, why are you just now concerned about reporting it? Did you ever ask your mother? I assume you know about the balance because you looked at your credit report?

    2. WildMajesticUnicorn on

      You ask a lot of important questions here. Just two quick starting points.

      First, I would order a free credit report so you can see what has been happening with this account. Does it have late payments that are hurting your score?

      Second, can you talk to your mom? If what you want is for her to pay her own debt and stop using a card in your name (a very reasonable request) is that something you can talk to her about?

    3. superswaggy362 on

      The only way this will go away is if you report it as fraud and involve the police. Your mom will be held criminally liable if you go this route. Your only other option is to lock down that account and pay it off yourself. Whether or not you are held liable depends on the result of the investigation.

      I do have a question though. Why would your mom “cancel” your card? It was in your name not hers right?

    5. Onomatopoeia-sizzle on

      She sounds either extremely under financial pressure or she is mentally ill. A touch bipolar would explain that behavior

    6. buttoncode on

      You should have reported this years ago when you first saw the balance, yet you continued to let her use the card. I hope capital one doesn’t accept this as fraud.

    8. Ixios on

      How are you checking the balance if you don’t have access? Are you seeing the info from one of your credit reports? You can (and should) take over the account.

      All you have to do is go to Capital One’s website and tap/click the Sign On link, then tap/click “Forgot Username or Password?”, then you will be presented a dialogue asking for your last name, ssn and birthdate. The system will find your account from there and you should be able to change your password and login.

      After gaining access to your account you can lock your card.

    9. Deep90 on

      **1.Should I report this as fraud/ unauthorized use to Capital One?**

      Yes

      **2. How likely is it that I could still be held responsible for the balance given the length of time?**

      You are being held responsible for it right now. You should be taking actions in hopes you won’t be. Keep in mind you normally have 60 days to report fraud. I would omit mentioning you’ve known about it for a while.

      **3. What are the risks or consequences of reporting this, especially if the person responsible is a family member?**

      Do you think your mom asked these questions when she took your card and maxed it out?

      **4. Should I file a police report, or wait to see what Capital One requires?**

      Do both. Call the bank to stop the bleeding, and then call them again to give them the police report.

    10. Fit_Cryptographer969 on

      I’m sorry, but there are a few inconsistencies here.

      If you knew about this years ago and let it continue, then yes, you’re likely still on the hook for the bill. You say you thought she canceled it, but you also seem to know the balance kept increasing. Credit reports usually only update about once a month, so if you were monitoring it more closely than that, it raises the question of whether you still had account access and if you logged into that account at any point after supposedly handing it over to your mom to “cancel,” that makes it harder to argue you had no responsibility.

      At 18, you absolutely should’ve been able to trust your mom. That part is awful, and she was wrong for that but once you found out, you should have shut it down immediately. Instead, it sounds like it stayed open because she was making payments and the increasing limit may have been helping your credit, at least for a while.

      I don’t know… there’s just a lot about this situation that doesn’t add up.

      For what it’s worth, your mom sucks for putting you in this position.

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