I lost it all…but that’s not stopping me

So i have been building in public on X for over two years now. It's been going pretty well.

I've made over 50k from all my "side hustles" in that two years i've gotten laid off twice from my full time jobs.

I live in NY. It's not cheap and we own our house… so I don't want to get behind on mortage payments.

I have 3 kids.. twin boys who are 3 and a daughter who is 23 months. It's a crazy time. I've been lucky enough to spend time with them but what suffered was money.

We went through everything…

Our savings, both our 401ks… I sold everything I made in Indiehacking to other people in the community to pay bills this month.

I'm still looking for a job in my industry and it has taught me a few things.

1. Money doesn't buy happniess but it does let you sleep.

It really is hard to think about when you cant put food on the table for your kids(i am doing all side gigs (door dash etc while i look for a job + building sites for people etc.)

1. People are kind

I've had tons of people help me out on this journey. Like I said over the past two years i've lost 2 jobs due to mass layouts. So it's been a rough time for us as we couldn't build up the savings. The last time I was out of work for almost 8 months. This time it's been about 4 months. I've been lucky enough to grow a small following on X and have built some cool things over the years so people have wanted me to help them with their products or bought all of mine(I had over 140 domains at one point)

1. Time is the most important thing.

I am not a negative person and i know i'm lucky because I have 3 healthy kids. But man it's been the best time. I've seen my kids grow up in front of my eyes. From Covid and working from home till not working for over a year. I have seen my boys turn into something special. Plus i've had quality time with my daughter. I know when i get older and i get through this… I love this time.

1. I wanna be successful

I don't need millions of dollars but i sure don't want to be in this sititation anymore. I want ot provide for my family and make my kids happy( i know all they need me to be is present but it's hard saying no to a kid that wants a new toy and you know you can't buy it for them).

1. Switching roles.

AI and vibe coding was a big thing and just like other industries it turned out to be a good side hustle money for me. As usual I never make something that "takes off" but i always build things that do decent. Hopefully my next venture is something that will be that "BOOM" momemnt because I love not having to work long hours and spending all my time with my kids. But i'm also willing to put in the hours to build something or work for something great.

6, Interviewing is hard

The worst feeling is when you are in the final round with another candiate and they get it over you. Do that over 3-4 times and you feel like it's you who is the problem and you need to fix something about yourself, your resume or how you talk to others. You just get in your head(i have many times). Follow up emails never work because most companies just send a hey thanks but we went with someone else. You look to find what you can do better chances are they never see your message. I mean i've emailed, Linked In Messaged so many people to get no responses. I can only hope they see my message when I don't need them anymore and they are looking to buy my company.

1. You need to bet on yourself

I always heard it from people and it's crazy to think about but it's true. You need to believe in yourself over anything. I have been told NO alot in my life and I won't let that stop me. I know i'm good at something and will find my way. It's in my blood. It may happen when i'm old but it will be all worth it.

1. You find your true friends

I have never been someone with lots of friends, i don't talk to many people in my life other than family. That wasn't intentional i would always reach out to old college friends, high school friends etc but would never get a response. So my motto was don't be friends with someone who doesn't wanna put in the effort also. The crazy thing is people on the internet who I have never met helped me more than people I thought were my best friend. When you are at your lowest like I am you really see who cares. I'm not talking about my family. I know my wife loves me, and my family loves me. I'm talking about co workers, collge buddies etc. They tell you to reach out to all your contacts on Linked In, call the people you know etc. You'd be suprised how many people never answer the Linked in Message or the text message. They obviously aren't required to help you but a response can happen atleast.

1. Routine

If you get into a routine in anything you will see improvements. Do something for a day and you see the results. Do something for 30 days and you will see results.

I've made some good habit changes that i'm proud of. Will see if they pay off.

1. Love yourself.

Even though i am going into a dark place I still am not mad at myself in a bad way. Do i beat myself up thinking i could of did something better or saw me getting laid off earlier and look for a job. Sure… but I don't harp on it. I'd rather find a new place and build out my new ideas then worry about that stuff and put myself into more depression.

WIll i make it? I hope so… but if i don't i'll just do a regular 9-5 job the rest of my life and contiune to work my way up in the field i'm in. But man… id love to build something and call it my own and make enought to just do that everyday.

sorry for all the grammer eras / run on sentences etc. I just wrote this and didn't go back and re read it. I'm sure it makes no sense but I had to share