I’m feeling so guilty about allowing my kids (twins)to go out of state to 2 great schools and rack up this kind of debt. They are both seniors this year and will graduate with $125k -$150k. My husband and I are the co-signers. One is going into the insurance industry and the other is Human Resources. They are hard-working and make smart decisions. I have been paying a tiny amount into each of the loans to help. I will inherit a good amount of money to help (in about 10-15 years) them but in the end, I think I’m a terrible parent for allowing this to happen. I haven’t asked them what they think about it, except hearing them say that they know they aren’t alone and they will figure it out. Is my bad judgement going to wreck their future? Are there ways to help.
Bad parenting? Two kids $125k in debt
byu/Sunshynegurl68 inStudentLoans
Posted by Sunshynegurl68
11 Comments
Are these private or federal?
Payoff aggressively for the insurance child. PSLF for the HR child. Vote in ways that help students and education access.
At least you cosigned. My parents wouldn’t even give me that.
Coming from someone who’s married to someone with $150k in private loans from undergrad, it’s not a great start to life imo. I am incredibly fortunate that my parents were able to pay that much for my education, but looking back I wish they would have pushed more for an in-state school and doing it as cheaply as possible. The only reason to pay that much for an education is if it’s for law school or medical school. Absolutely no education is worth that much (and not for nothing, but going into insurance and HR does not cost $125-$150k if that’s how much they each have, it should have cost less than $40k for each degree).
We don’t struggle and we both work hard and are going to be paying it down this year, but while other people are saving up for a house or starting a family, we’re delaying that to be more financially stable. His loan payment is $1,300 (started at $1,500) a month which just hurts every time we have to make it.
Never regret any decision related to increasing your child’s opportunities in the future. Especially education.
Why does this sub act like student loans are a death sentence?
You already made the decision, we are human and not perfect. Move forward with a more positive mentality. At least they are graduating and educated. No one can take that from them.
Just prepare now for large student loan payments since private not federal. Offer they stay with you after school cuz they likely won’t be able to afford loan and housing. And since you co signed, make sure you save in case they default.
Each state per pupil spends 10-30k a year k-12. So let’s say 20k a year. A cheap studio costs $1k at 12 months. Another $500 a month so $32,500×4=$130k
So your not a bad parent you just didn’t get a discounted. Put all you can towards the loans.
This topic is tearing me up. My daughter is finishing up her two years at a CC. More than likely, she’ll transfer to UCLA. Now, she could graduate from UCLA debt free if she commutes about an hour each way, 4 days a week. If she lives on campus, she will end up with about 30k in debt. Is 30k worth living/having that campus life?
Their combined debt is $125k or each of their debt is $125k?
I didn’t choose that path. My kids all got excellent educations at schools within our budget- they all have the federal loan amount so $27,000. They were not permitted to go to any school that was not affordable for us. With the first kid that didn’t go over so well, but she was perfectly happy to go to Villanova for an engineering degree and walk out with $270,000 in loans because everyone’s doing it. But instead she got her degree from the university of Maryland – which was affordable for us because she had a presidential scholarship. She graduated in 2023 is making over six figures and almost has her student loans paid off. I would never allow my children to be saddled with that kind of debt people do desperate things, and it impacts their future their ability to buy a home to save for their own children, and it may limit who wants to be a partner to them. There are plenty of good affordable schools out there. I think it’s hard to say no to kids, but sometimes you have to do what’s best for them and it is a difficult pill to swallow.
Also, your kids may think they know what they wanna do but lots of kids change their major once they get to school.