I had a lot of lovely and supportive comments when I posted I got my biggest contract to date. A $20K contract to do some video and communications work. I made that post about 7 months ago.

Today I finished the project and wanted to share my initial reflections on it.

Initial Fears

At first I felt bad for asking as much as I did, this was a repeat client I had a strong relationship with. I felt "Someone better could do this", "I am not worth this much", "what if I fail.".

Getting over Self Doubt

At one point in the process I had had to use therapy skills on myself as I freaked out that we had missed some key shots. We hadn't, I recognized that I self sabatoge and try and tell myself I am a failure because of past experiences. This was not the case. After calming down, I found the footage. And even if we had missed it, I could go to the client and say we needed to get it. It wasn't the end of the world that I made it out to be.

20K isn't as much as you think it is.

It sounds like a lot when your average gig is $1k. But it runs out fast. I had to hire someone for some the work that needed to be done as I couldn't do it all.

I could have done it all

Self doubt and insecurity did seep into me at the start. However, I realize now that I didn't need help, I had the skills I needed, I did not however have the trust in myself.

I Learned to Trust My Client

In the past when someone told me they liked my work, I wouldn't believe them. "Oh they don't understand", "so many people are better than me", "they are just being nice", these thoughts would sabotage me and I wouldn't have clear communication with the client or I wouldn't follow up for more work. This time when they said they loved my work, I believed them. Because they should, it is good and I know what I am doing.

Next Project

Full disclosure this is a side gig I do, my main focus is being a stay at home dad and I am fortunate enough that I can take my time to choose clients and projects. I would like to do more projects that speak more to my personal curiosities than client work. I may go do a podcast or docu-series as those are where my passions lie. But I will always be happy to do client work for the right price.

Those are my initial thoughts after finishing. I am sure i will have more over the next few days, but I wanted to get this out there, because I am feeling really good about myself!

Thanks for reading my win! And thanks for being such a supportive community!