Mid-career academic/data scientist feeling trapped between stability, burnout, and wanting a more meaningful life

I’m in my mid-40s, have a PhD, and work full-time in a research/data-science role in Europe. Four years ago, my job was my top priority and a big part of my identity. Now I feel very unmotivated and anxious at work.

The strange part is that I get anxious both ways: if I’m not invited to meetings, I worry I’m being pushed out or quietly sidelined; if I am invited, I worry something is wrong. I know this may be burnout or hypervigilance, but it is exhausting.

I’m also the main provider for my family, so quitting impulsively is not realistic. I have a partner and child, and stability matters a lot. At the same time, I feel that my life has expanded beyond my current job. I care about family, music, mentoring, research, and building a more meaningful life. I’m not lazy, I still work hard on things I care about, but my motivation for this specific role has collapsed.

I’m considering a gradual transition rather than a dramatic exit: applying to more aligned roles, building consulting possibilities, and keeping creative work alive on the side. I’m especially interested in hybrid paths: science + data work + communication/consulting + music, rather than one single identity.

Has anyone been through something similar in mid-career?

I’d especially appreciate advice on:

1. How did you tell the difference between normal burnout and a sign that the role was truly no longer right for you?
2. How did you make a transition without endangering family finances?
3. Did changing teams/roles help, or did you need a bigger career change?
4. How many job applications or networking actions per week felt sustainable while working full-time?
5. How did you stop interpreting every workplace signal as a threat?

I’m not looking for “just quit” advice. I’m looking for practical, grounded transition strategies from people who have navigated this without blowing up their life.