I was raised in New York City by a single mother and we had always been struggling financially but it was worse than I could have imagined. A few months before my 18th birthday, In February of 2025 my mom took her own life she had been suffering from chronic depression which was only exacerbated by financial stressors. This past year I started as a freshman in university (studying architecture) and had to take out a few federal loans. The university I attend is in upstate New York and they don’t make it feasible for me to stay there during breaks. The only option I have is staying with my grandparents in New York City, however my uncle has continuously tried to antagonize me assuming that I am spoiled and unwilling to work despite me securing as many opportunities in university (becoming an RA) to lower my costs and be able to attend in the first place. I have been searching for internships and literally any gig in the city for several months and all I seem to get is a string of rejections. I am unsure for how long I will be able to stay with my grandparents before my uncle tries to boot me out and I barely have savings because I have had to pay a lot of my tuition out of pocket. I would appreciate it if anyone with connections in the city would be able to direct me to a job, I have open availability all summer.
Mom passed away in desperate need of a job
byu/Mrseatfoo inpersonalfinance
Posted by Mrseatfoo
8 Comments
man that sounds really tough, i’m sorry you’re going through this. have you tried reaching out to your university’s career services? they usually have job listings and can help you network with local firms, especially for architecture. also consider looking for freelance gigs or part-time work at local firms; it’s a grind, but it could help you out.
You have an r/relationships problem. Not a personal finance problem.
If your grandparents are glad to have you there, and it’s their house, get their help to tell your uncle to f-all-the-way-off and leave you alone.
Also, check with housing. Go in and speak to the highest up person you can. They should have accommodations for breaks for those who can’t travel home. You just have to find out how to be allowed to stay, and where you can stay.
Does your uncle live with your grandparents? If no, screw what he says and just avoid him when he comes around to your grandparents house. If he does live there and is truly making your life hell you could try getting a job while at school (beyond RA) like waitressing or bartending and use the money to get a cheap Airbnb or sublet during breaks when you need a place to stay. You could even get one close to school and work instead of going back to the city so you could keep earning money while on break.
Are there no on campus jobs available? Usually Admissions has tour guides in the summer. If your dining halls are open, can you work for them?
You need to speak with you advisor or dean of class or someone in student life to explain your situation and why it isn’t feasible for you to go home and ask for their assistance securing a position on campus.
Really sorry about your loss. Have you checked to see if you have any survivorship social security benefits if your mom had previously been working?
I was an RA and secured it for financial reasons too in college, congrats on getting that! It was a huge financial help (and big responsibility), but I learned out a lot from it. Struggled my way financially through college but I’m on the other end now!
Try Coolworks.com for seasonal work for summer and winter break. You can find gigs like at resorts that come with accommodation.
Had a family member who was a nanny in NYC while she attended NYU.
Set an appointment with your Dean of Students and/or your student affairs office, explain your situation and how you may be “at risk of dropping out”. Student retention is important and identifying yourself as at risk should hopefully open up more options for you. Also, meet with your faculty advisor to tell them the same thing. Your situation *is not* unusual. After working in higher ed, I’m no longer in shock of students who are receiving food stamps, state Medicaid or staying on campus as a “summer worker”.