I am 31F. All I ever think about is money. Ironically, I am in the best financial situation I have been in my entire adult life. I have no debt, but I make $12 per hour at my full time job. I doordash on the side and it helps a lot. Thankfully, my bills are extremely cheap compared to most people (around $900 per month).
I have enough money to pay my bills, buy groceries, and maybe go out to eat/do something fun a couple of times per month, and put a little into my savings account. I'm also paying for a vacation that I plan on taking later this year.
I only started my 401k a couple years ago and I feel so stupid. No one ever explained to me how important that was and I simply didn't do the research. I just didn't know. Everyone in my family has always lived paycheck to paycheck and no one every bothered to talk to me about money or saving.
I have about $800 in savings right now. It just feels like no amount of money will ever be enough. I had close to $2000 in savings but had a couple of emergencies. Now it just feels like I'm one more emergency away from having nothing. I feel like I'm in a constant state of slight panic about money. Like I said, it's all I can think about. It's all I have to talk about with my family. I'm not sure what I even want to gain from this post… I suppose I am just venting. But I will gladly take any advice anyone can give me.
I feel so behind financially
byu/Subject_Accident4348 inpersonalfinance
Posted by Subject_Accident4348
29 Comments
Lady, don’t worry. You’re not doing bad as long as you’re at least making something. Real youth unemployment is at like 20%, as long as you work and manage to save any money, you’re doing better than many. Others at your age don’t even have a 401K, you’re working to build a solid future. Keep going, if you’re behind stopping won’t put you further anyways.
Not sure where you live, but you really can’t find a job that pays more than $12/hour? You could be a server at a restaurant and make double that in most areas of the US.
just keep at it. compounding works. you cant see it now but you will in 5, 10, 15 years.
> started my 401k
That’s awesome! Well done!
>gladly take any advice anyone can give me.
Do you have a written budget you maintain where you track monthly expenditures and try to predict future expenses?
If you want to move beyond living paycheck to paycheck, maintaining a written budget and revising it as you collect more data is critically important. There are plenty of people who make 100x your income that also live paycheck to paycheck because they don’t have the discipline to manage a budget.
>I had close to $2000 in savings but had a couple of emergencies.
To be clear, this is a success. This is your savings doing *exactly what it’s supposed to be doing*. You had an emergency, and you were able to fall back on your savings without having to respond with debt.
I think you’re doing about as well as can be expected for making what is less than minimum wage in some states. You may want to step back and take inventory of your skills and aptitudes as your financial ceiling is going to remain extremely low at $12/h. Frankly amazed you managed to have any retirement savings at all. You can’t squeeze blood from a turnip.
If your family lived paycheck to paycheck, they likely don’t have good financial advice to give you.
Your spending habits are fine. Your very good at living frugally and avoiding lfjsfhke inflation . income is just too low. $12 an hour is really low pay. That’s like $25k annually. Really low, and only manageable because you have low expenses and debt free, and assumably unmarried + childfree. It would be worthwhile to find a full time job that pays $25 an hour so you don’t have to doordash on the side.
Frankly, if you have no debt, your net worth is already higher than most people your age. You’re doing great with what you have, and many, many people only start contributing to their 401k in their 30s or later, if at all.
The bad news is, $12 an hour just plain isn’t enough. No amount of saving is going to get you out of the “one emergency” bucket.
Does your employer offer any kind of education benefit? Are there online certifications you could pursue? Coursera has a lot of free or very affordable certs. The job market is ass, I know it’s easier said then done, but there’s no magic bullet here to turn that wage into a nest egg.
You shouldn’t feel bad. People don’t really talk about it, but saving (and especially saving for retirement) is a luxury that a lot of people can’t afford because they are living paycheck to paycheck.
All that matters is that you are able to save something now. Fwiw, I didn’t really start saving until I was 35, due to a large part of not being able to afford to.
I’ll go ahead and be that person. You can (and I bet you’ll be able to) to do better. Keep pushing. Take this mindset from “I’m behind” to “I’m hungry to catch up, even if it takes me years”.
Rooting for you to keep breaking the cycle. But not fake nice and compliments.
Increase your skill set to increase your income. Obviously literate and intelligent so lots of options. $12 per hour is not going to get you where you need to go. Always pay yourself first. 10% min to mix of 401k and savings.
I don’t want to judge because I dont know your situation or where you live, but $12/hr seems low. I would first start looking for a better paying job. Even if it’s $15/hr, that will add up fast. Secondly, join a larger bank or credit union if you aren’t already. Most of them have free financial advisors and can help give you options. I recommend having someone manage your money who works completely off commission and go high risk high reward play. Just don’t look at it too often, it will be very volatile. But in 25+ years when you want to retire you will be set. Best of luck!
Don’t feel behind. When I met my husband he was 38 years old, a finance degree, had an income of 180k in LCOL Texas, with history of a few half million dollar bonuses in his career, and still managed to be in debt with no assets. To this day, 5 years later and with a lot of my help all the while fighting me along the way, he finally has some savings, but he still struggles heavily with making the effort to save, and I have to do all the money saving initiation in our lives.
You on the other hand, are aware of the importance of financial literacy, which mean you are already much ahead of a lot of people. Keep it up!! Keep living within or below your means, and make efforts to keep learning and following through of ways to save!
You should be able to make at least double $12/hour immediately if you are able to show up consistently to work as a server or whatever.
Im 32 and make 37 dollars an hour in corrections find a different job.
what kind of remote job do you have? maybe you can look for another?
Make a budget. I prefer the zero based, forward looking, envelope style. And we use /r/ynab
You need to plan for your money and see if Doordash is actually profitable after you set aside the income taxes and pay for gas and vehicle maintenance.
You do need more income, but a better job is preferable to more bad jobs.
Curious if you have any education or practical skills?
Maybe consider getting a temp job that can lead to growth? Or focusing on your network? Who do you know that can help you find better employment? Finally, even retail may offer you a path to earn more money over time.
You’re doing well to save at that income but it’s not sustainable. Your goal should be to increase your pay.
To invest in yourself, you need to take a long term lens. If you’re making $12 an hour, I assume college didn’t happen. Maybe start out at a community college, and then look to transfer? The best way to really increase your income quickly is an educational reset.
I graduated from college at 25-25. Sure I was younger than you, but older than most. I’m about the same age as you now and I made $180k all in.
$12 per hour is wild. If you put in a little work you can surely get up to $20 per hour and maintain your work from home lifestyle. Thinking things like customer service.
You may not love call center work, but for a 70% pay raise it is a no brainer.
Check out Dave Ramsey podcasts it might give you perspective it may not. But it’s worked for me. Just find what works for you
You need to find a way to earn more. If it means going back to college, so be it.
Use your vacation money to relocate. Start applying to jobs outside of your bubble, ones that pay a lot more. Land job first, then move.
With a bachelor’s degree, you are eligible to do remote, seasonal work as a scorer for the big testing companies: ETS, Pearson and Measurement Inc. Check out their websites and apply for what’s available. You should be able to pick up hours around your regular schedule (or live that overemployed life). The work is very spotty since it is seasonal and project based, but I used to regularly make ~10k/year extra and it was very, very easy.
You keep responding with answers about things you don’t want to do, yet you’re asking for advice.
Advice?
Figure out a mid to long term goals, then the things you need to do become clear and can’t be denied. Without clear goals, easy to say no to things.
Unfortunately $12/hour isn’t remotely enough to be a career. Also I think you mean “I have to think about money all the time” by “All I ever think about is money.”
Take nothing for granted. No debt and minimal expenses is huge my friend. Drop the Venmo and I’ll send you 12 bucks to give you an hour of your life back.
Refocus your attention from saving and calibrate it towards earning. $12/hr is a near impossible wage at 31 years old.
Don’t worry, money isn’t even going to be worth anything in 15 years anyway
You’re not behind. You’re actually ahead of where you think you are, and I can prove it with your own numbers.
You have zero debt at 31. That alone puts you ahead of the majority of Americans. The average 30-year-old carries over $30k in non-mortgage debt. Your bills are $900 a month, which is a structural advantage most people would kill for. You started a 401k. And your side hustling to close the gap. That’s not desperation, that’s resourcefulness.
The $800 in savings thing. You had $2,000. Emergencies happened. You handled them without going into debt, without putting it on a credit card. Thats literally what the money was for. It worked. The system you built did exactly what it was supposed to do. Now you rebuild it. That’s not failure, that’s the cycle working as intended.
Some practical stuff. Target $1,000 first. Not $10k, not some huge number. Just $1,000. Its the point where most single emergencies stop being catastrophic. You’ve already proven you can get past that, so you know the path. Automate even $25 per paycheck into savings. The amount matters way less than removing the decision from your hands. You won’t miss it after two weeks.
Your 401k at 31 is fine. If your employer matches, contribute at least up to the match. Thats literally free money. If theres no match, you’re still building the habit, which honestly is the harder part.
And $12 an hour won’t be your wage forever. Your clearly motivated. The DoorDash on top of full time work proves that. That energy finds better oppertunities eventually. When it does, your low cost of living means almost all of that raise goes straight to savings.
The constant thinking about money isn’t a character flaw. Its a trauma response from growing up paycheck to paycheck. You learned that money equals survival, so your brain won’t stop monitoring it. Recognizing that is actually the first step. Your not bad with money. Your hypervigilant because you never had a safety net, and now your building one for the first time with no blueprint from anyone.
You’re not behind. Your just early in a process nobody taught you existed.