For the past years, I have accumulated a lot of debt. I have private and public student loans, personal loan, car loan, but what is causing me the most stress is credit card debt.
I work from 4 am till 7 pm and Saturdays and Sunday morning to pay all the bills and pay off the credit cards.
I feel alone and ashamed. When I try to talk to my wife, she tells me not to talk about it because it stresses her out which i understand since she is small business owner with her own stressors.
When i want to pass on hanging out with our friends to make more money, my friends tell to relax and recharge which my wife agrees with. I get their point and i try to not to think about the debt, but them saying that just makes me more anxious and alone.
I have been living with crushing debt and need a community
byu/danbo199809 inpersonalfinance
Posted by danbo199809
8 Comments
man that sounds really tough. don’t be too hard on yourself, you’re trying to make it work. have you thought about joining a support group or finding online resources? it helps to talk it out with folks who get it.
Yeah i think thats why im here. I watched some many videos on personal finance and feel knowledgeable to get out my situation but struggling with the emotional part of living with debt
Sorry to hear about your situation. That sounds very difficult.
Look at it this way: All of the money you owe has already been spent. It’s gone. You got goods and services for that money, but the money is gone. You’re left with debt.
Now you have to *work* to earn money to pay the debt. It’s as simple as that. You need to work to raise the money.
If it’s crushing, try talking to a debt consultant, not sure what’s the name called in America but maybe they can help with your loans to a manageable level
You are the audience that Dave Ramsey built his career around. Read or listen to his book Total Money Makeover, watch his YouTube videos and listen to his podcast. It will give you a plan to get out of debt. First step for you sounds like you need to get your wife on board and build a budget.
I think that something that hasn’t been said yet is your wife brushing off the convos about the debt. It won’t be a fun conversation, but you guys should really be on the same page with this sort of thing.
I’m sorry your wife isn’t all in on helping deal with both of your debt. That’s gotta be lonely. Don’t be ashamed, we’ve all made poor money decisions before and currently, lol. You need that extra mental stamina to attack the debt. I’m a Dave Ramsey girl. Check him out.
I went from married to divorced with 2 kids, mortgage and making 14k a year part time with 100k debt plus my mortgage. With Ramsey, I’m down to 15k of debt and make $85k a year in 2 yrs. He’ll light your pilot for sure. Good luck brother
You need to sit down with your wife and write out a budget together. Track every penny in, every penny out. Stop using the credit cards immediately. You are likely spending more than you realize, unless there was a single event that blew everything up.
You said you’ve done your reading, so you are probably well aware that there’s no easy way out of this.